When There Aren’t Enough Hours in the Day, How Do You Make Time for YOU?

Raise your hand if there are just too many things on the “to do” list…

This morning’s social media post scraped the surface, but I just have so many more things to say about this idea of carving out time for self.

Not a single one of us wears only one hat.  What I mean is that each individual person holds and works to fulfill multiple roles on a daily basis: employee, parent, partner, friend, caregiver, customer/consumer, support, coworker, patient/client, therapist, etc.   Each of these roles come with unique and often times extensive demands.  How do we show up as our best selves consistently in these roles?  How many times have you found yourself reactive in line at the grocery store because the line isn’t moving?  How many times have you gotten frustrated with a partner/friend/child/coworker but weren’t sure exactly why and then felt regretful about your behavior or tone of voice? 

We’re often in a position of having to multitask and keep track of ever changing circumstances and responsibilities.  When we run out of time in the day, certain things need to get moved to tomorrow’s “to do” list, which is already full.  What things do you push off until tomorrow?  In my own experience, and in my work with clients, it frequently is our own self care that gets the ax first.  We put ourselves last in order to fulfill our perceived expectation of others.

What would it be like if we stopped doing that? How would you feel if you started carving out time and space to support greater balance between self care and care of everything else?  For some, these questions spark anxiety and fear of the consequences.  I want to be clear- what I’m not saying is neglect everything else and only do what you want to do with blatant disregard of how it may impact others.  What I am saying is this:

Who is going to die if you wait to unload the dish washer or fold the laundry until tomorrow so that you can spend an hour reading, or creating art, or going for a walk?  Who is going to die if the kids get a store bought rather than homemade treat for the school’s bake sale so that you can use that time instead to enjoy the few remaining warm days outside?  

Of course not all of life’s impositions on our schedule are this easy to navigate.  But some of them are.  We need to be strategic and discerning about where and how we spend our time, and with whom.

So I ask you this:  How comfortable are you with saying no?  How comfortable are you with prioritizing yourself?

I encourage all of us to give ourselves permission to prioritize ourselves.  You may find that if you’re well, you’re better able to meet the need of the day.  Funny concept huh?